WHEN DO-IT SCHOOL 
ENTERTAINED 



-BY- 



MART BONHAM 







PRICE 25 CENTS 



Eldridge Entertainment House 

Franklin, Ohio 2^ Denver, Colo. 



9 

944 So. Logan Street 



Money-Making Entertainment Novelties 
for Church, Scheol or Lodge 



Miss Nibbs' Novelty Shop 

By Alta Becker. This is a novel and humorous en- 
tertainment, introducing 'Liza Ann, Miss Nibbs, two ' 
traveling salesmen, shoppers, mechanical dolls and 
mechancal maid of all work. A good little stunt where 
a short, clean, humorous number is desired. Plays 
about 30 minutes. Price, 25c. 

nrhe Brightville Indoor Chautauqua 

By Bessie Baker and Nellie Hanna. Here is a brand 
new idea for an evening's entertainment. It is in 5 
parts, each part representing a day at Chautauqua. 
Gives wide scope for introduction of large cast and 
many specialties. Complete programs suggested as 
follows: Part 1, Chautauqua Concert Company; Part 
2, Living Pictures; Part 3, Musical Entertainers; 
Part 4, Farmers' Night; Part 5, Coonville Jubilee 
Singers. Price, 35c. 

Sorepaw & Fells Indoor Circus 

By Margaret S. Bridge and Margaret H. Hahn. The 
Grand Annex and Musee, Freaks, Curiosities and 
Monstrosities, never were in it with the marvelous, 
amazing, mystifying array outlined in its pages^ Ar- 
tistic, ambling, agile, 'andsome acrobats; cajoling, 
cadaverous, costly, curious, cunning clowns; Hee- 
Shee, the Monkey Girl of Yucatan; all of these and 
many others will be seen in the Big Peerade before 
the show starts, ladies and gentlemen. Keep to the 
right — don't crowd. Price, 25c. 

As Ye Sew 

A "talking doll" missionary play by Dorothy Crich- 
ton. A lot of fun and some wholesome lessons are 
contained in the conversation of the dolls who dis- 
cuss the motives of their donors. Splendid for Young 
People's or Missionary Societies. 10 girls, 1 boy, or 
all girls. Time, 20 minutes. Price, 15c. 

Finding the Key 

A dialog and drill for 10 or 12 girls and boys. Suit- 
able for any religious program, but especially for 
Easter. Time, 20 minutes. Deals with problems of 
youth, recreations, etc.; also with those of Commun- 
ity Life and the present spirit of Unrest. Interspersed 
with suggested songs. Drill very effective. 25c. 



Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



J 



When Do-It School 
Entertained 



A Christmas Play In One Act. 



By 
MARY BONHAM 



PRICE 25 CENTS 
Copyright, 1922, Eldridge Entertainment House. 



PUBLISHED BY 

ELDRIDGE ENTERTAINMENT HOUSE, 

FRANiOJN. OHIO DENVER, COLO. 



Cast of Characters 



.^^ V^^ 



DAISY j 

ROSE [ Members of the Advanced Grade, 

TOM j Committee on Entertainment 

ROBERT — Large Boy who brings the guests. 

ROY — Boy who brings Miss Kaziah and her cat to the 
Entertainment. 

DAN DOO— The bad boy of Do-It School, also Santa 
Glaus. 

GRANDPA AND GRANDMA FLUTE— From the 
'"Mounting." 

AUNT LIZ PANE— Afflicted with Rheumatiz. 

SILAS FLICKER— Who lost out on Security. 

BLIND BILL AND LITTLE BILL— From Hemlock Hol- 
low. 

TIM LANE — Old Southern soldier who warms up on 
Dixie. 

DICK WITHERS— A reformed drunkard. 

MISS KAZIAH KITE— Once disappointed in love. 

BILL SPARK— Courting swain. 

BELL LOVE— The mountain belle. 

MRS. MARIAH HOPE— Widow with youthful hopes. 

GEO. WASHINGTON HOPE ' 

Age twelve 
JAS. MADISON HOPE 

Age ten 
ANDY JACKSON HOPE 

Age nine 
W. J. BRYAN HOPE 

Age seven 
WOODROW WILSON HOPE 

(Senie) Age six 
WILSON WOODROW HOPE 

(Junie) Age six 

TWO FIDDLERS or BANJO PICKERS (black) 



Proud sons of the 
Widow Hope 



©cm 63235 



DEC 30 *22 



When Do-It School Entertained 



Costumes are out of date except for those entertain- 
ing. Some ivear ragged clothes, some very bright inhar- 
monious colors. All guests show a lack of taste in dress, 
tut they are supposed to have on their "best." Suit cos- 
tumes to the character. 

Scene — Have as large Christmas tree as stage will 
alloio, on right of stage. Decorate tree in any style. Have 
packages on tree with names, etc., on them for guests. 
Have box large eriough for Dan to hide under in promiur- 
ent place. Arrange seats for most of guests on left of 
stage, facing tree. The packages may be "bogus" but 
there must be candy and nuts to pass to the guests to eat. 
This may take the place of "treat" as given in somei 
schools. 

Curtain must not be raised till Dan raises it. 

Daisy — (standing in front of curtain) As chairman 
of the high class in Do-It school, I am due you an ex- 
planation. At our class meeting to decide upon our 
Christmas entertainment, someone suggested that we 
have a Bible-way Christmas — that, instead of giving 
gifts to each other, we pool our money for a tree and 
some eats and invite in all the "halt, the lame, and the 
blind," who lived in the vicinity. The idea was conceded 
to be "just grand," and now you may have the pleasure 
of looking on as we entertain. (Exit R., then run back.) 
Please excuse me. I forgot to tell you that the exercise 
will not begin for a few minutes, as one of the boys had 
to go quite a distance out of his way to get Miss Kaziah 
Kite. She and her cat would never forgive us if we left 
them out of our entertainment. I hope everybody will 

3 



When Do-It School Entertained 



have a neighborly chat while we wait on Miss Kaziah 
and cat. I must look after the eats. {Exit R.) 

(Enter Dan, dressed as Santa Claus and holding a 
stick of candy ten or tivelve inches long.) 

Dan — Hov/dy, Everybody! Merry Sweet Christmas 
to YOU ! I'm awful glad that girl had such a thoughtful 
brain and sent for Miss Kaziah, which thereby prolongs 
the raising of the curtain, thereby giving me a chance 
to tell you something. Why, everybody is looking so 
pretty. Well, if there ain't (naming some man or boy in 
audience), over there by his girl, just like a bumble-bee 
hanging 'round a rosebud. Why, everything just suits 
me to a gnat's toe, and I'm going to tell you a secret. 
Will you tell? Well, if you do, I'll not put a thing in 
your stocking but a great big leak, like you. Here's the 
secret. I'm Don Doo, the bad boy of Do-It school, as they 
call me. When they asked me how I liked this new style 
entertainment biz, I said, "Ain't you going to have a 
Santa Claus?" and they said '*No," and then I said, ''Well 
you can have it vv^ithout me." Then one of the high 
class girls said, "Of course, we didn't expect any help 
from the bad boy of Do-It school." Right then I biled 
over, and decided to show 'em a few things, good or bad. 
Now, you watch me. I'm to make fun. Don't you tell on 
me, and I'll raise this curtain. (Pulls curtain up.) .They 
don't know I'm here so I'll hide under this box and wait 
developments. (Gets under box.) 

(Enter Daisy, Rose, Tom, ready to receive.) 

Rose — (in high tone) Well, well, well! 

Tom — Where are you going to dig it? 

Daisy — It won't be very deep, judging by the tone 
of her voice, Tom. 

Rose — Do hush ! You are both bat-eyed. Don't you 
see that someone has raised the curtain? 

Tom — Who would have dared to do it? ' 

Daisy — Oh, someone in Do-It school. That Bad Sam, 
Dan Doo, I guess. 



When DO'It School Entertained 



Rose — Yes, and I suppose he's sneaking out behind 
some curtain, having an attack of giggles. 

Tom — Well, I will do him up starchy for this. 
Rose — Huh! He's sleek enough now. 

Tom — Rose, don't be so thorny. I'll just stiffen him 
BO he can't walk. 

Daisy — Let's don't do him up physically. Let's give 
him a hard task to do. 

Tom — Fertile brains must devise the task then. 

Daisy — Rose, Tom said you are thorny. You impose 
the task. 

Rose — Will you allow me to lay a plot involving oth- 
er people. 

Daisy — Yes, just so you make it rough on Dan for 
meddling on this stage. 

Rose — Well, I'm going to make Dan the scapegoat 
for the making or the breaking of a match. You know, 
that the scapegoat in olden times was loaded with the 
sins and the burdens of the people and sent out in the 
wilderness to bear them alone. 

Tom — What under the sky has she in mind, Daisy? 
Rosebud, please unfold. 

Rose — Don't look so sour, Thomas Doubt. Rose- 
buds unfold quickest in sunshine. 

Tom — My patience shall be an everlasting diamond 
set in smiles to hear the unfolding of this rosy plot. 

Rose — In short, I'm going to make Dan Doo carry a 
love letter and a box of candy from Dick Withers to Miss 
ICaziah Kite. 

Tom — I'm too thick-headed to see how that will pun- 
ish Dan for this offense. 

. Daisy — I never could see missing links, either, Tom. 

Rose — Do you know the condition that exists be- 
tween Miss Kaziah and Mr. Withers? 

Tom — Everybody knows that Dick Withers is, or 
was, a down-in-the-gutter drunkard — 



When Do-It School Entertained 



Daisy — And everybody knows, too, that Miss Ka- 
ziah would not marry him because he loved the bottle bet- 
ter than he did her, — 

Tom — And everybody knows that Miss Kaziah al- 
lows no one to mention the name of Dick Withers to her. 

Rose — Now, don't you see what a hornet's nest Tm 
stirring up around Dan? Would either of you dare to 
take a love letter and a box of candy from Dick to Ka- 
ziah? Say, would you dare do it? 

Tom — No, indeed. I never meddle in love. 

Daisy — I'd expect to come away bald or blind, if I 
did. 

Rose — Now then. Any boy who is bold enough to 
raise this curtain against the order of the Entertainment 
Committee in the face of the assembled audience is bold 
enough to approach Miss Kaziah on the subject of her 
discarded Dick Withers. Let the consequences come. 

Tom — Are you gong to consult Mr. Withers about 
what you are going to do? 

Rose — No. I have reason to know that Dick is 
a reformed man and is dying to get into Kaziah's good 
graces, but he's afraid. I believe if we can get Dan to 
do this, he will feel that he has spent his superabundant 
energy to some purpose. If you can just get a bad boy 
started in the right road, he will outstrip the ever-good 
ones. 

Daisy — Aren't you afraid he will balk on doing this ? 

Rose — Here's a large fellow here to make him if he 
does, after we have appealed to the daring that's in him. 

Tom — Well, Rose, I believe your plan will work. In 
either case you will win. If the letter and the candy 
meet with favor, there'll be a wedding, and Dan will be 
a hero ; and once a hero, always a hero. If the letter and 
candy are trampled under foot Dan will get a Maggie 
Jiggs broom-rolling-pin-crockery beating, thereby get- 
ting well paid for the raising of this curtain. 

Daisy — Good! I predict Dan Doo will become a 



When Do-It School Entertained 



hero under the direction of Miss Rose Keen. Oh, I hear 
the guests coming. I'm going to be the first to greet 
them. (All run out R.) 

Dan — (rolling out from under box and jumping up) 
Great Opportunity! Folks, did you ever get sat on like 
I did? Won't do to let 'em get ahead of me like that. 
(Grabs a sheet of paper out of tablet on tree and writes 
fast; folds. Then he takes his long stick of candy and 
wraps it in paper ^ pins the letter to candy and u^raps all 
in several papers, labels to Miss Kaziah, pins on tree and 
goes under box, saying) Now, listen for me. 

(As many children as desired may enter tvith guests 
and seat them. Or, if preferred, the children may be\ 
guests.) 

{Daisy enters with Grandma and Grandpa Flute, 
followed by Blind Bill and Little Bill, then come the one^ 
arm ex-soldier, Tim Lane unth Aunt Liz Pane, who hob- 
bles. Tom comes with Silas Flicker, icho is very humped 
and sour looking. Rose enters with Mrs. Hope, ivho car- 
ries Junie in one arm and leads Senie by the other. W. 
J. Hope holds Senie's hand, Andy holds W. J.'s, James 
holds Andy's, George holds James\ All are seated in 

rows.) 

Daisy — Are all the little Hopes here, Mrs. Hope? 

Mrs. H. — Let me see, Miss. George Washington. 

(She calls each by name in order, and all answen 
"Here.") 

Daisy — Now, we are all delighted to have you all 
with us — 

Grandma F. — Lar, chile, we'un air the ones ter be 
glad. Well, ain't the tree grand, Grandpa? 

Grandpa — Let me git off my fur-seein' specs, maw. 
Yes siree, that thar's a rale purty tree. I hain't seed nary 
one like hit, an' I've been in this mounting kentry goin' 
onto the heels of eighty year. 

Daisy — You may feast your eyes on the tree till the 
other guests arrive. 



8 When Do-It School Entertained 

Rose — And chat about Christmas joy for this is to- 
be a very merry Chritmsas for everybody. 

Tom — And forget all your aches and pains — 

^ Aunt Liz — Say, young man, hain't got no pills fer 
rheumatiz, have yer? 

Tom — No, Aunt Liz, but I believe if you'd get to 
wondering what is on this tree for you, the rheumatism 
woud leave you. 

Aunt L. — Now, look-a-here, young man, them fruits 
a-hangin* on that tree is mighty purty, but I bet if my 
rheumatiz was tied up in a package an' hangin' on that 
tree, you wouldn't smile when you got hit. (Groans.) • 
My cuzease ain't goin' 'low me many mo' Christmases. 
I'm so awful stiff in the jints. Can't eat nuthin' now 
but gawrden sass, an' hit's gittin plum skearce in Pos- 
sum Holler. Whut air you cookin' these days. Miss Flute? 
Law! If yander don't come Bill Spark and Bell Love, a- 
holdin' hands. (Tom shotvs Bell and Bill seats.) I won- 
der how long they've been a-talkin'. (She continues to 
talk in lohispers all along.) 

Little Bill — (pointing) Oh, Uncle Job, tell 'em 
ter give me that thar jumpin' jack. (Runs to tree and 
handles jack, which drops off.) I'll be doggoned, never 
done that trick afore! 

Tom — No harm, Billie. This jack likes to jump, sa 
you may jump him. (Bill smiles and sits on front seat 
and jumps the jack.) 

Aunt L. — (turning) Howdy, Mr. Lane; ain't seed 
you in a coon's age. Any courtin' goin' on over in your 
holler? 

Mr. Lane — -I reckon not, Aunt Liz. All married out 
over thar. 

Aunt L. — Looks like you'd be fetchin' *nuther wife,, 
bein' you ain't got but one arm. 

Mr. L. — Now, Aunt Liz, if you didn't have so much 
rheumatiz — 

Aunt L. — Hush, Tim, 'tain't no wuss than havin*" 



When Do-It School Entertained 



one arm. (Looks back.) Law! If thar don't come them 
fiddle men. Tim, you kin pat yo* foot now. 

(Fiddlers ploA/ Dixie, all pat feet, Tim sings cho- 
TILS and throivs hat in air,) 

Grandpa F.^ — Now, give us Yankee Doodle. (They 
play and Aunt L. dances a jig. Tim joins her and they 
sit on front seat together. Hope children get restless.) 

Widow H. — Now, you colts better behave yerselves, 
er ye'll not git nary thing of fin' that tree. (Geon^ge slips 
out of seat and fingers articles on tree.) George Wash- 
ington Hope, don't you touch that. Yer namesake got 
in big trouble a-tetchin' uf a cherry tree. (Madison fin- 
gers doll.) You, thar, James Madison Hope, let that thar 
doll alone. Shorely you hain't thinkin' 'bout the gals 
this young. 

Rose — Is the little boy sick, Mrs. Hope? 

Widow — No'm, not now. But he did have a awful 
colic -a^-eatin' of dried apples yistiddy. I had a awful 
time puttin' the panic on his pains. You'll 'scuse him 
f er settin' on my lap. 

Rose — Of course, Mrs. Hope. What is his name? 

Widow — Why, Woodrow Junie Hope. Him an' Wood- 
row Senie, here, is twins. Woodrow Junie looks like his 
paw, who got drownded. (Weeps.) 

Rose — They certainly have nice names. Let me give 
them some candy. 

Widow — Tell the lady some thanks, Junie. (He eats.) 

Senie — Mammy, wipe my nose. (Wipes his nose 
with colored handkerchief.) 

Widow — Miss Rose, I jist want ter tell you that 
William Jennings, here, is a awful good speechifier, an' 
he'll speak fer you. 

Rose — All right, Mrs. Hope. William Jennings, 
won't you speak for us? 



10 When Do-It School Entertained 

W. J. — {lisping) If I wuz a Thanta Kaus, 
I'd visit you tonight, 
An' fill yo' thock tho full of love, 
You'd (whistle) at the thight. 

(Bows.) 

Rose — ^Very nice, William Jennings, Junior. I hope 
you will equal William Jennings Senior, some day. 

(Enter Miss Kaziah and Roy.) 

Roy — Ladies and gentlemen : I'm sorry we are late. 
Miss Kaziah's cat got scared in the car, jumped out and 
gave me a two-mile chase. 

Kaziah — I felt that I must bring Snowball along, 
for I'd be lonesome without him. 

Blind Bill — How many cats do you keep now, Ka- 
ziah? 

Kaziah — Just thirteen. Six got ketched in steel 
traps last year, and two's been dogged ter death. I'm 
havin' awful bad luck with my cats. (Stroke^ Snowball.) 

Daisy — Have a seat here. Miss Kaziah. (Indicates 
box.) 

Geo. — Maw, James Meddlesome is pullin' squibs off 
the tree. 

Widow — James Madison Hope, you come here and 
set by me. You hear me? Law, if here don't come Uncle 
Dick! 

(Enter Dick, leading dog, hound if possible.) 

Tom — Glad to see you, Mr. Withers. Have the seat 
of honor by Miss Kaziah. (Dick looks everyivhere else 
for a seat; Kaziah fidgHs.) 

Dick — (sitting with back to Kaziah,) I didn't 'low 
Ise comin' ter this here thing till the boys come by an' 
washed my dishes and made me. 

Grandma F. — Dick Withers, it's time you had a 
dishwasher in calico. 

Dick — Reckon maybe as I'd a had one if I hadn't 
bee sech a blame fool. 



When Do-It School Entertained 11 

(Kaziah twists handkerchief,) 

Aunt L.-— Dick, "while there's life there's hope." 

(Madison fires squib.) 

Widow — Didn't I tell you a while ago to behave yo'- 
se'f ? (Pulls him out, spanks him and leads him back.) 
Now, set here by me till you git yo' present. (They sit.) 

Senie — Mammy, wipe my nose. 

Andy — Mammy, I want that thar prutty thing on 
the top. 

Widow — Hush, Andrew Jackson, you can't have it. 
JuNiE — Mammy, I want some more candy. 
Silas — Mariah Hope, I'd put some stickin' plaster 
on them sparrows' bills, if they wus mine. 

(Enter Daisy and Rose with candy and nuts ivhich 
they pass. Every one eats and makes remarks on th4 
tree or the occasion. Soft music if desired.) 

Grandma F. — Say, Liz, I can't eat these here nig- 
ger-toes without no teeth, kin you? 

Aunt L. — No, but I'm goin' ter slip mine in my 
stockin' an' beat 'em up when I git home . 

Silas — Kaziah Kite! You don't feed them nuts ter 
yer cat, I hope. 

Kaziah — Yes, Silas, I give him all kinds er sass. 

Widow — Junie, you be keerful how you eat nuts, 
fer you kin taken the colic awful quick and I didn't 
bring my calamus root. George Washington, you be 
keerful with that chawin' gum. Don't swaller it, and 
you kin keep it till termorrer. (He puts gum on his nose.) 

Tom — Now while you are eating, some of the school 
will give you a song. (Any number sing some Christmas 
carol. Introduce any stunts here desired, recitations, 
drills, pantomime. Guests make any remarks about the 
performance they please.) 

Bell — Now, hain't that nice! Bill, I wouldn't a- 
missed this fer nothin'. 



12 When Do-It School Entertained 

Bill — Yar, hit's the best thing I ever seed. 
Widow — Well, I got up an' combed my head before 
breakfast ter come and I ain't sorry of it. 

Grandpa F. — I ain't never seed sich afore, but I 
reckon as how hit ain't agin the Scriptures, is hit Silas? 

Silas — I ain't got nuthin' ter say, sence I lost out 
on s'curity. 'Pears ter me like the world's awful bad. 

Grandma F. — Silas, forty year is long 'nuff fer one 
spe'll er the blues. My Bible hain't teached me ter wear 
a long face. Ef you'd take yer eyes off them lost dollars 
ye'd see the Lord's put a lot er good things in the 
world. 

George — Maw, Meddlesome is choked on a candle. 

Widow — Massy! Silas, hold Junie, quick while I 
onchoke him. {Pounds Mad. on back; he gags.) Water^ 
water, he's dyin*, oh! 

Grandma — (taking hold of him) Don't lose yer 
narves, Mariah. (Pulls candle out ivith finger.) Now, 
sir, you set here by me and I'll make you behave. (Senie 
takes Junie' s candy. This makes him cry out loud.) 

Widow — What's the matter with Junie? 

Silas — Senie stole his candy. 

Widow — Laws-a-mercy ! He's holdin' his breath. 
Water, quick! Nuthin' else'll save him! 

Aunt L. — Yes thar is. Spank him. 'Tain't a thing 
but meanness. Spank him, Mariah. (She spanks Junie 
and he catches breath.) 'Tain't the fust one that ever 
got spanked fer puttin' on. I give my Jonas many a lick 
fer — 

Grandpa — Amen ! 

Tim — Say, Withers, if ye hain't goin' ter keep Miss 
Kaziah comp'ny, I'll swap seats with yer. 

Kaziah — I reckon as how ye had better let good 
enuff alone, Tim Lane. 

Wick takes up courage enough to turn toivard Ka- 
ziah and make eyes.) 



When Do-It School Entertained IS 



Geo.— Say, Uncle Dick, you and Miss Kaziah ain't 
talk none fer twenty year, has yer? 

Widow— Shet up, youngin', you don't know nuthin* 
'bout sparkin'. 

Geo.— Well, maw, you sed ternight 'd be a fine time 
fer 'em ter spark up. Bell and Bill over thar air a-spark- 
in', I guess. 

Bell— 'Tain't so, er 'tain't none o' yer bizness, 
smarty. 

Daisy — Now, if you are through eating, we will dis- 
tribute the fruits of our tree. 

Bell — Miss Daisy, paw said as if you has any candy 
left over ter send him a leetle bite, bein's he's took with 
a pain in his spine. 

Silas— Bein's ye air givin' things away, I'd like ter 
take the old woman a gum-drap er two. 

Rose — Why, certainly. (Gives hags to Bell and Si.) 
Why did not Mrs. Flicker come with you ? 

Silas— Bein's I lost out on s'curity forty year ago, 
she didn't have no new calico. 

Andy— I been lookin' fer a Santa Glaus, but I can't 
see him. 'Tain't much Ghristmas 'thout Santa Glaus. 

{Dick and Kaziah are facing and talk occasionally. 
Dan croivs loud, Dick and Kaziah jump up.) 

Kaziah — Mercy me! Where's that rooster? Dick, 
hit's a bad sign fer a rooster ter crow 'fore twelve o'clock, 
an' I was jist about ter git happy agin. 

Dick— Kaxie, hit's a good sign fer a rooster ter 
crow 'fore twelve at Ghristmas. Hit's a sign ye air goin' 
ter git sumthin'. 

{Santa comes out, dances to limber up, smiles, all 
clap hands.) 

Santa — Howdy, Grandpa and Grandma Flute, Aunt 
Liz, Blind Bill, Widow Hope and Gompany. You make 
me feel like mince pie does— awful glad — and if there 
ain't Mr. Lane, seventy if he's a day, but as gay as a 



14 When Do-It School Entertained 



spring cricket, and playing hands with Aunt Liz. And 
there's cousin Silas Flicker, about to drap his hump of 
trouble and looking Merry Christmas straight in the 
face ! And yonder sits Bill and Bell Spark — 
Bell — 'Tain't so. I hain't married yit. 

Santa — You didn't let me say my say. I started to 
say, there sits Bill and Bell sparking. {Turns and sees 
Dick and Kaziah.) Gee-up, reindeers, I've got to turn a 
summerset, fer Dick and Kaziah are warming up the 
soup. {Turns over. All clap.) 

Blind Bill — I guess you air right, Santa, fer I've 
been a-hearin' somebody a goo-ooin' and a-coo-cooin'. 

Andy — Maw, they hain't give us nary thing off the 
tree. 

Widow — Shet up, Andrew Jackson, you always tryin* 
stir up trouble. 

JUNIE — Mammy, wipe my nose. 

W. J. — Mammy, I'll say another peach fer thome 
candy. 

Tom — All right, William Jennings. 

W. J.: — Old Thanta Clauth ith fine an' dandy, 
Hope he'll bring me lots of tandy. 

Santa — Here's you a stick for that, young man. 
{Hands W, J. candy.) 

Tom — We didn't know Santa Claus would get here, 
but since he's come he will help us. Santa, you read out 
the names, etc., as I take the presents off the tree. {He 
hands package.) 

San. — With love for Aunt Liz, a cure for rheumatiz. 
{Takes another package.) Grandpa Flute. 
When the ground is covered with sleet, put these arctics 
on your feet. 

Grandpa — Amen ! 

San. — Blind Bill: This Christmas cake you may not 
see. 
But when you eat it you will happy be. 



When Do-It School Entertained 15 



Widow — Junie, you an* Senie wake up an' git yo' 

presents. (Shakes them.) 

Jas. — Wisht you'd hurry and give me sumpin'. 
San. — Here's an ox-eye for you to lick, Meddlesome, 
till your time comes. (Hands him striped ball of candy,) 
Andy — Mammy, make Santa Claus gim ME a ox-eye. 
Widow — Here's a gum-drap — now hush. 

Senie — Mammy, they hain't gim me nary thing. 
(Cries,) 

Widow — Dry up. Yer time's comin*. Younguns 
can't be fust. 

San. — (reading) To George Washington Hope, a 
book about the Father of his country. Read this Georgy, 
and be ready to cross the Delaware on any Christmas 
night. 

Geo. — Thanky-doo! Jist whut I been wishin' fer, 
ain't hit, maw? 

Mad. — Wonder whut they're goin' ter gim ME! 
Widow — A tongue halter, I hope. 

San. — Here's a whip and a cowboy suit to the boy 
who drives the cows — 
And, with an ox, his mother's garden plows. 

Grandpa — Amen ! 

Mad. — (cracking tvhip) Gee, thar. Buck, whoa-haw! 
Widow — Got whut you wanted, now hold yo' tongue. 
Andy — Mammy, whut they goin* ter gimme? 

Widow — You know whut I'll give you if you don't 
hush. 

San. — To Grandma Flute, so sweet and good, 
A dainty, lacy sleeping hood. 

Grandma — Well, Grandpa, ain't that the very thing 
for me? 

San.— To Blind Bill's Billie, a brand new gun- 
To hunt Brer Rabbit and have some fun. 



16 When Do-It School Entertained 

San. — To James Madison Hope, squibs, squibs, 
squibs — 
Be careful, James, and don't blow out your ribs. 
Mad. — Whoopee, now I'll make the old cats skin up 
the tree. 

San. — To Bell Love. May you always be as pure as 
the enclosed. 

Aunt L. — Open hit, Bell, and tell us whut it is. 

(Mad. fires off squib,) 

San. — Gee-me-nee ! This boy is trying to fire me. 

Bell — Aunt Liz, hit's the purtiest white paper, but 
hit ain't got no lines on hit. 

Aunt L. — Maybe that's the style now. 

San. — To Mr. Lane, a handsome cane; 
To Mother Hope, loads of soap. 

Grandpa — Amen! Use hit Mariah. (Very, large 
package.) 

San. — Woodrow Wilson Hope, Senior, automobile. 
Woodrow Wilson Hope, Junior, flying machine. 

San. — From the boys of Do-It school, a purse of five 
dollars — 

To Silas Flicker and wife, 
For a new start in life. , 

Grandma — Now, ain't that nice! Git out of the 
dumps, Si, and bring Lucindy out ter preachin' Sunday. 

San. — To Bill Spark, a flashlight. Guess that will 
come in handy when you cross the bridge to see Bell 
these dark nights. Bill. 

Bill — You bet yer life ! 

San. — To Andrew Jackson Hope, an Indian suit and 
feather ; 
To W. J. Hope, shoes for the coldest weather. 

San.' — Well, here's a pretty for Mirs Kaziah Kite. 
Doesn't say what it is — 

Aunt L. — Open hit, Kazie, an' see what 'tis. 



When Do-It School Entertained 17 

Kaziah — Seems like I hain't got the nerve, Aunt 
Liz. 

Mr. Lane — Dick, if you don't offer you service ter 
Kaziah, I'm comin' over thar myself. 

Dick — I's kinda skeered she'd gimme 'nuther set- 
back, Tim. 

Kaziah — Shet up, an' ontie this knot, Fraidie-cat. 
{To Dick.) 

(Dick, very happy, cuts the knot.) 

Dick — {meaningly) The knot's ontied, Kazie. 

Kaziah — I'm awful glad, pickie. 

Aunt L. — I do believe they're makin' up, Mr. Lane. 

Mr. L. — I alius said they'd marry yit. 

Aunt L. — ^Whut you got, Kaziah? 

Kaziah — Pears like hit's got a lot er packn' 'round 
hit. Here's a letter and I didn't bring my specs with me. 
The writin's bad. 

San. — Let me read it for you. Miss Kaziah. I'm 
used to reading bad writing, getting letters from all the 
children. 

Kaziah — As 'tain't no love letter, I reckon ye may 
^s well. 

San. — Dearest Kaziah: I've done give up the bot- 
tle, and b'lieve in the glorious 18th. If you will fergit 
the past and take me fer a Christmas present off this 
tree, make hit known by eatin' this stick of candy. From 
your lover, Dick. 

{Kaziah hides her face and puts candy in pocket.) 

San. — Did I read that right, Dick? 

Dick — I reckon as how them's my sentiments, all 
sed. 

Bell — Let's see yer candy, Kaziah. 

Kaziah — Shet up. 'Tain't none of yours. {Bites 
off a nibble.) 

Tim — Kaziah, ain't you goin' ter give me a bite? 



18 When Do-It School Entertained 



Kaziah — I reckon as how it'll be a long time afore 
ye git a bite, Tim Lane. 

Andy — I want a piece of Miss Kaziah's candy. 

Widow — Shet up ; her beau love give her that candy. 

Andy — Wisht I had a. beau love. 

Widow — I hope you ain't thinkin' 'bout the gala 
a-ready. 

San. — Here's a stick, sonny. 

Mad. — Say, maw, air they goin' ter marry? {Points 
to K .and D.) 

Mrs. H. — T'ain't no concern of yourn if they is. 

Andy — When Uncle Dick marries her I kin call her 
Uncle Kaziah, can't I? 

San. — Not uncle, but Aunt Kaziah, Andy. 

Andy — {going to Kaziah) Aunt Kaziah, ye hain't 
give me nuthin' yit. 

Kaz. — Well, ye needn't be callin' me aunt till after 
we're married. 

San. — Hurrah! Wedding in the air. {Sings, tune of 
"Jingle Bells/') 

Jingle bells, jingle bells, wedding on the way, 
Bake some cakes and have some fun, 
To celebrate the day ! 

Grandpa — Amen ! 

Mad. — When they goin' ter ring the bells, maw? 

Widow — Hold yer hush, Meddlesome. 

Mad. — When they goin' ter ring, Uncle Dick? 

Dick — Well, I reckon as Kazie says about termorrer,. 
James Madison. 

Mad.— Scotts ! I'll be thar. 

W. J. — Maw, I've et tho much candy hit tastes a* 
nasty as anything else. 

Widow — I'm glad you got filled up onct in yer life. 

San. — Hello, here's another present. Upon my lifet 
For Dick Withers. Haven't we given him a present? 



When Do-It School Entertained 19 



Dick— Reckon as IVe got all the present I want. (He 
takes Kaziah's hand,) 

San. — Let me see. (Reads.) When you've found 
yourself a wife, you may use this butter knife. 

Aunt L. — Well, I declar, gittin' silver a'ready! 

JUNIE — Mammy, I'm a-gittin' sleepy. 

San. — Well, as I've got to get on my long round to 
fill stockings, I'll wish you all a merry Christmas and a 
happy New Year. (Sta7^ts.) 

(Enter Tom Daisy and Rose, with long feather,) 

Tom — Hold on a minute, Santa-Dan-Doo. 

Rose — No, Dan-Doo-Santa. 

Daisy — No, it's Dan-Doo, Hero, of Do-It school, cur- 
tain- raiser, match-maker, who has won a feather in his 
cap. (Pins feather on his cap.) 

Dan— I give you my profoundest thanky-do. (Boivs. 
Exit.) 

Grandpa — Well, maw, as hit's gittin' late, we'd bet- 
ter mosey on. Young folks, we'uns is awful proud of 
our good time. Hit makes we-uns feel better fer the big 
folks ter take us by the han' sometimes, an' give us a 
taste of the sweets of life. (All rise, getting ready to go.) 

Blind Bill — Them's my feelin's, all sed. 

Everybody — Mine, too. 

Aunt L. — Mister Tom, I did fergit my rheumatiz, 
md enjoyed myself more'n I ever did in my life. 

Grandpa— Amen ! 



CURTAIN 



ff^ 



New JuvenOe Entertainments 



A-B-C-Capers 

By Soemple. Here is an attractive and novel number 
for the Primary Grades or Kindersrarten. Little Tim's 
despair in not being able to master letters is turned 
to keen interest by the antics of the alphabet troupe. 
Plays about 20 minutes. Price, 25c. 

Emily's Dream 

By Mary Frix Kidd. This is the story of a Geogra- 
phy lesson, which, instead of being irksome, was, 
through the medium of a Good Fairy, made very in- 
terestings This is done by presenting a Geographical 
Pzigeant. For a large number of children, who pre- 
sent drills, exercises, etc., in costumes of different 
nations. Time, about 1 hour. Price, 25c. 

The Love Flower 

By Bell Elliott Palmer. A very pretty exercise for 6 
or 10 girls and 1 boy. Suitable for Children's Day or 
Easter, and can be given either in or out of doors. 
Time, 10 minutes. Price, 15c. 

The Silver Sandals 

By Banche Thompson. Ths is a charming new play 
for 6 boys, 5 girls, fairies, peasants, attendants, etc. 
The Princess is downhearted and refuses to be con- 
soled. The fiddler plays, peasants do folk-dances, fai- 
ries drill, but not until she gets the silver szuidals is 
she contented. Plays 1 hour or more. Price, 25c. 

When Betty Saw the Pilgrims 

By Margaret Howard. A pretty story showing hoW 
dissatisfied Betty w^as cured by her mother, who tells 
the story of the hardships of the Pilgrims, which is 
illustrated by ten tableaux. Large numbers of chil- 
dren can be used. Plays about ^0 minutes. Price» 
25c. 

Princess Rosy Cheeks 

By Efde Sammond Balph. A "good health" play for 
children, which is very impressive. Introduces Fresh 
Air Fairies, Soap and Water Fairies, Tooth Brush 
Brigade, Food Fairies, Rest Fairies, and others. Good- 
sized cast required w^ith two older children. Plays 
about 1 hour. Price, 35c. 

Queen Loving Heart 

By Jean Ross. A splendid children's play, teaching 
many good lessons. A pretty story of the crowning of 
Loving Heart, her capture by the Indians and sub- 
sequent release, because of her kindness. Can be used 
for May Day play. 1 1 speaking parts, Indians, etc. 
Plays about 45 minutes. Price, 25c. 

Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



HALLOWE'EN HILARITY HINTS 

Good Things To Keep The Ball Rolling 

A Bunch of Stunts for Hallowe'en 

A new book of doings, contributed by many wide- 
awake writers. Covers almost any kind of festival, 
party or entertainment you wish to give. Drills, 
games, stunts, decorations, etc. Price, 75c. 

The Fairy and the Witch 

A 1-act allegorical sketch for Hallowe'en, by A. D. 
Nelson. 1 adult, male or female, and any number of 
children. In this very picturesque little play, the 
Black Witch of Hallowe'en falls under the spell of 
the White Fairy and superstition gives way to rea- 
son. Time, about 20 minutes. Price, 25c. 

The Frolic of the Witches 

By Juanita Mae Gulp. This is a clever little drill es- 
pecially adapted for Hallov/e'en. Introduces flash- 
lights and brooms7 and Is for 11 girls. Price, 25c. 

Guess Who Song and Drill 

Something novel. Price, 25c. 

The Haunted Gate 

By Edith Wormwood. A clever play for Hallowe'en. 
The capture of the ghosts furnishes a good climax to 
the play. 3 males, 7 females. Plays from 30 to 45 
minutes. Price, 35c. 

Jimmy's Ghosts 

By Cecil J. Richmond. A sketch for children. Five 
speaking parts with chorus of witches. Can easily be 
given in any school room. Price, 15c 

Scarecrows A-Roaming 

An eccentric drill. Price, 25c. 

What To Do on Hallowe'en 

Compiled by Juanita Mae Culp. This is a really good 
collection of helpful suggestions for this occasion. 
Suggestions for decorations, menus, parties, games, 
stunts, recipes, a play or two, and other good things. 
Purchasers will find themselves relieved from worry 
and trouble concerning Hallowe'en. Price, 40c. 

Fun With Fortune Telling 

Compiled by Mrs. G. L. Henson. Here is a book that 
will furnish fun and interest for any social gathering. 
Every one is interested in their "fortune" and this 
book is arranged to give you pleasure, either individ- 
ually or as a crowd. Price, 50c. 

Eldrtdge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

•44 S. Logan St. 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 




017 400 414 6 

ANOTHER PATRIOTIC MONOLUt 

"WHEN MOm CAME HOME 
FROM THE MARNE" 

By SEYMOUR 3. TIBBALS 



T^HE STORY tells of a widow's son, a peace- 
* ful young farmer, who enlisted in the U. 
S. Marines and lost an arm, as his father lost 
an arm at Shijoh. A stirring description of a 
gas attack and how the Marines won the 
fight. 

The climax is reached when Monty comes 
back and drives the cattle up the lane. 

Suitable for any reader and a number that 
will be welcome on any program. 



€ 



PRIGE 26 CENTS 



THE ElDRiOBE ENTERTAINMENT HOUSE 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also iS!tS£, DENVER, COLO. 



.MtanMHdMji^ 



